DO YOU STRUGGLE WITH EMOTIONAL OVEREATING? ***READ THIS!!!!***
First, thank you to Sandy at Sandy's Kitchen for reaching out and getting this information for all of us! This is from her, not from me.
I wanted to share this with you guys that I took from another group. It makes a lot of sense and it is kind of what I am working on in therapy for binge eating.
My name is Nick and I am the Behavioral Specialist with the Nutrition and Wellness Team here at TSFL. Thank you so much for reaching out for some assistance with this challenge you are facing as I would be happy to try and help!
When trying to change bad habits the first two things to understand are that (1) you overeat because of your urges to and (2) you have these urges to overeat because of habit. Since there is only one cause of each and every time you overeat, all you have to do to break out of this vicious cycle is to stop following your urges! However, there is a major roadblock to this solution, you can’t just say "Okay, brain, I’m done overeating so turn off those irresistible urges." It doesn’t work that way. Once the habit is established, by repeatedly following your urges, there is no way to turn off your urges except to retrain your brain by not acting on your urges to overeat repeatedly.
Now, at this point you might be thinking… "Well, duh, of course! But how do I do that? Do I just have to grit my teeth and suffer through my urges? Because that doesn’t work!" To which I’ll reply, “You’re right! That doesn’t work." So, let’s talk about something that does work called Mindfulness; i.e. being in direct contact with the present moment, rather than drifting off into automatic pilot. Let’s go through the five (5) step process that will help you to break free from your overeating habit:
1. View Urges to Overeat as Neurological Junk – In order for you to stop acting on your urges, you have to see them as essentially meaningless. These urges and cravings you experience are nothing more than junk emanating from the depths of your brain in order to maintain a self-destructive habit. You don’t overeat in order to cope with life or some underlying emotional problem; you do it because of your urges and you have these urges because of habit. Also, these urges are completely separate from your true-self, which brings me to the second step.
2. Separate Your True-Self from Urges to Overeat – Your urges aren't truly yours – you are not your habit. You want a better life for yourself than stuffing large amounts of food in your mouth. You have goals for yourself that you know are inconsistent with overeating. You know you want a healthy life but your habit keeps you trapped in destructive patterns of behavior. Your true-self is the seat of your consciousness. It holds your values and goals and identity. It won’t be until you separate the most sophisticated and most uniquely human part of your brain from your urges, and really feel that separation, that you will feel capable of saying no to food. You will need to recognize that any thought or feeling or urge that encourages you to overeat is something completely apart from your true-self and is merely a product of the habit. In other words, disconnect from those thoughts and feelings instead of getting so wrapped up in them.
3. Stop Reacting to Urges to Overeat – Once you separate your true-self from your urges, it will become possible to stop reacting to your urges, meaning that you will stop letting your urges affect you emotionally. I am sure, currently, you are emotionally overwhelmed by your urges. You probably feel mad, frustrated, depressed, anxious, desperate, even – when you’re on the brink of giving in – excited. Reacting emotionally only gives your urges power, strength, and the ability to influence you. When you let your thoughts and urges make you mad, frustrated, depressed, anxious, or excited, you allow them to take over your whole body and state of mind – and that probably leads you right to food. However, If you separate your true-self from your urges to overeat, you can be aware of them but you can stop paying attention to them and reacting to them. With distance between yourself and your urges, you can experience them as if they’re playing on a tape recorder, as if they’re not your own thoughts and urges. They were only the result of your brain trying to maintain a habit.
4. Stop Acting on Urges to Overeat – Not only does separating yourself from your urges give you the power to stop reacting emotionally to them; more importantly, it gives you the ability to stop acting on them. Once you can stop acting on your urges, you will break the cycle. You don’t have to substitute any other activity for your overeating habit or distract yourself with a hobby, work, phone calls, exercise, or journaling. You don’t have to do anything productive. All you have to do is go about your evening as if you are disconnected from your urges to overeat. You don’t want to struggle with these urges. You want to see them as not really you. If you lose that separation and think that it is really you who wants to eat, then you will get wrapped up in your urges and you may overeat again and that’s okay. This will take some practice. Just go back to listening to your urges as a detached observer.
5. Get Excited! – This will actually speed along your brain changes. Praise, from others or from within, and enthusiasm for learning something new cement that learning on a physical level in the brain. In short, “Celebrating a new discovery increases the likelihood that it will be remembered.” – Thomas Czerner. Every time you allow yourself to experience a craving without acting on it, every time you have thoughts and feelings encouraging you to overeat and don’t act on them, every time you have powerful urges to overeat but you remain detached and unaffected by them… GET EXCITED! Brain functions that are given attention and significance strengthen, and brain functions that are not given attention and significance weaken. Focusing on the power of your true-self to remain detached from your urges to maintain a habit and congratulating yourself for it serves to strengthen new connections in your brain and weaken the old ones.
Following these steps doesn’t mean that you will never have urges to overeat again because it is possible for neurons to remember old patterns of behavior. However, if your habitual brain sends out an urge to overeat in the future, you will know exactly what to do: Listen to it with detachment, and don’t react emotionally to it or act on it. Then, your habit will never develop again!
Okay, I hope this information was helpful for you today and should you have any follow-up questions please feel free to write back anytime. Thanks!
Take care,
Nick
